april 25

mild, not wild

Friday:

Knocked off at 6 only because the whole gang was waiting downstairs at The Bar for us. I should have worked a little more. It was a frustratingly unproductive week capped off by a maddenly unproductive day. So we drank. Beer only, because I'm cheap. (Cocktails are now $7 at The Bar. Gah.)

In attendance was one former employee, one former boss and his lovely wife, A*, Polly and her friend. Not exactly the crowd to wind down with. Too much biz discussion. So I concentrated on Former Boss's Lovely Wife and talked kids and opera.

Polly confided that she's decided she needs new friends. None of her current people can introduce her to the man of her dreams or the job that will get her to her dreams. It was startling to hear but it makes sense. I feel like I've let her down, but I really have looked. There really are so few worthwhile men over 25 in this town. The same with jobs.

Saturday:

Major, major score. Polly had called me Friday afternoon to alert me of a fire sale on tile at a local house parts company. So I got my ass outta bed and headed down there. It cost me two hours of combing through about 500 boxes of tile, plus a nasty sunburn on the back of my neck, but I found enough of what I need to create a mosaic for the outdoor table for our back porch. For $22. If you know tile, you know this is cheap. My collection retails for $300, easily.

In between tile hunting sessions A* and I ate at a relatively new vegetarian restaurant in North Portland across from the house parts store. It had recently been featured in the local paper so it was packed.

The cafe portion is in the first floor of a renovated Victorian. The owners are a young couple who live upstairs. They managed all the renovations themselves with funds from family.

We sat at the bar, with the busy kitchen in full view, and listened to the conversation of the couple next to us as they went over the list of Things To Do Before C*** Gets Here. Number one was "call Dr. Perry," and number two was "call INS." They also had a dog-eared copy of "What To Expect The First Year" so I concluded that they were adopting a child. After a while, we got annoyed with their obsessive list making and concentrated on our obsessive yard planning.

Food was so-so. Much too limited menu. Soy sausage was inedible.

God. This is boring. But I'm committed now.

The afternoon was filled with more small projects and then a party at Polly's old boyfriend's house. Or maybe they're back together. Who knows. I have to call her to see if she spent the night. Having trouble keeping up? Me, too.

I drank 3/4 of a bottle of white wine and didn't even get tipsy. Ended the night tucked in the breakfast booth pouring over the Sunset plant book with Polly, calling it plant porn to make ourselves feel less old, since this was the big excitement for Saturday night. In bed by 11:30, fell asleep after Weekend Update. God, I love Tina Fay.

Sunday:

Wasn't hung over, but moved very slowly. Pruned the camellia. Babbled and gossiped with neighbors. Found out the dirty truth of my former neighbor's departure from her house. I had never heard in detail the state of the house when she left it. My. God. Picture a home ransacked by drunken frat boys crossed with the home of a fleeing fugitive: puke, old food, family treasures left to rot in the basement. Bizarre.

Ended the evening with bar-b-que, beer and bocce. And sore muscles from pruning.

A* and I hadn't spent much time together except when we had to discuss projects, budgets and next steps. It was a little frustrating except for the fact that anytime we had a disagreement we worked it out until we both felt resolved. We're getting back into our groove. There will be plenty of time on our vacation this week to be together, uninterrupted.

A weekend that makes for mild journal entries, yet a satisfying life.

I have to learn how to write about peace and contentedness. It has a richness and complexity that I have trouble capturing. Because I fight it. I think I'm now ready to give into it.

In a world full of death and fear and vicious conflict, I should take it and thank the heavens for my good fortune.

After writing this I took a deep breath, relaxed my shoulders, and my back snapped and crackled into place, released from the constricting tension.

Everything. All into place.

- april 24